WOW! Is That a Snake in Your Pants?

Yes it is, and no, I'm not excited to see you.


File this under the “What Was He Thinking?” folder.

A man walked into a pet store in Portland, Oregon, and stole a large python snake by shoving it down his pants and walking out of the store.

This snake thief was unaware that video cameras caught his every move. The unnamed man has been identified by police but is not yet in custody.

Christin Bjugan, owner of A to Z Pet Store, said they know who the thief is. “We know where he lives, we know where he works, we know all about him and his girlfriend. We’re just waiting to get our snake back.”

The security cameras showed the man walk into the store with his “blue-haired girlfriend”. Once in the store, they both casually walked up to the python tank. The man then handed his car keys to his girlfriend, opened the snake tank, picked up the poisonous snake, and stuffed it down his pants.

The store owner said the man was very lucky, as it was close to “feeding time” in the snake room. Nonetheless, she continued, “pythons do like dark, warm places.”

The snake, valued at around $200, is a black pastel ball python.

Sgt. Greg Stewart of the Portland Police Department said that while he has investigated thefts at pet stores in the past, this was the first time he has seen someone stuff a large, venomous snake down their pants. He added “Putting a snake down your pants is not super bright. There’s a lot of things that could go wrong.”

Sgt Stewart is right. But what this guy lacked in brains, he made up for in courage.